Photo by Treddy Chen on Unsplash


The Grim Reality of the Magical Job Market

Many skilled witches and wizards end up unemployed due to poor fundamental education and lack of career opportunities.

As much as it pains me to say so, we could learn a thing or two from the muggles regarding employment, entrepreneurship, and education. We, Magical people, are proud of our achievements and abilities, rightfully so I should say, but our pride blinds us from the actual reality our youth must face when they graduate: there aren’t enough good jobs available.

The Ministry is always expanding its workforce in administrative and operational positions, but ever since the fall of Voldemort, government careers have dived in popularity. The collaboration of some rogue agents of the Ministry is, of course, to blame for this. It has caused a loss of trust, an example of which can be seen in the Pensive-short embedded below.

Most departments offer stable careers paths, but the work can be tedious and boring. It also requires one to live in or near London, and ever since 2016, the muggles seem to have changed for the worse. It is understandable, so many of our folk would prefer a life far from the city and its constant stress.

Auror has become a second-tier profession in the eyes of many talented young witches and wizards. Now that the Dark Lord has been defeated for good, law enforcement jobs have turned into a dull routine of misuse of muggle artefact investigations, underaged magic abuses, and the odd illegal enchantment here and there. Once in a while, you’ll get a polyjuice-identity-theft case, but that hardly makes the job exciting, now does it?

Gringotts, against the zeitgeist, remains forcefully against equal opportunity employment and favours goblins for all positions of responsibilities. That wizards as talented as Bill Weasley only get to be promoted to managerial positions after decades of loyalty to the company is proof, once again, of the bigotry of Gringotts’ management. Goblins, it would appear, still hold a grudge against wizards for the Great Rebellion's repression. It’s about time they move on.

There is always commerce, but most business verticals are already covered by well-established brands that hold monopolies. Ollivander’s, its owner still the interesting character, has been in business for over 2,000 years and has never been challenged. Madam Malkin, Flourish and Blotts, or Florean Fortescue are names we’re all familiar with and brands we love. But if we think beyond our cherished recollections, they have been trusting the highly profitable Diagon-Alley business for ages without real competition. The only promising startup to emerge, without venture funding (it is all but inexistent here), is Fred and George Weasley’s shop. Of course, their success was due in no part to the business acumen and sales savvy of the two twins. George, now sole owner after the tragic death of his twin brother, was quoted as saying:

We try to hire as many sales reps as we can, as well as support and back-office functions, but there are simply too few people qualified in accounting or logistics in the magical world to serve our needs. We are actually hiring muggles as we speak.

And there lies the rub. Not only are job prospects grim in the magical world, but our children also lack the fundamental education that would allow them to access profitable careers here or in the muggle world.

Charms, transfiguration, or potions are necessary skills if one wants to become an accomplished witch or wizard, but they hardly qualify for an internship at Sainsbury’s or Coutts bank. Muggle children learn multiple languages, maths, sciences, and history. They also learn painting, music, and literature. This education broadens their horizons and provides them with countless professional opportunities our youth can only dream of.

A day will come when half-blood and muggle-born witches and wizards will decide not to attend Hogwarts. It is frankly a miracle that they still do. Imagine being the muggle parents of an eleven-year-old witch and sending her to Hogwarts for her first year. When she comes back next summer, she can’t show you what she’s learnt since it is illegal for her to do so. She can tell you all about the Goblin Rebellion mentioned above, or how to brew a few potions, but that’s it. As a responsible parent, would you send your kid back for another year when they can’t even do a simple table of 7s?

The Magical World is in dire need of education reform and direct investment in entrepreneurship and SMEs the country over. We need to provide our youth with good, profitable career prospects or I fear they’ll keep with the muggles.

And honestly, having studied these people for the past five years, you don’t want to be with the muggles right now.

I write about politics, business, society and culture on Medium. For startup/business content, check my newsletter:

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